Things to Talk About When Your Mind Goes Blank

The best things to talk about are whatever the other person is into right now: a rabbit hole, a trip, a show, a small win. Ask about that, and let them run with it.

30 things to talk about, with a line to start each one

Easy everyday topics 9
Their story 6
Light and fun 5
With specific people 8
Going deeper 2

You're driving three hours to a friend's lake house with Lorenzo, your friend's new roommate, whom you'd barely met before today. He offered to drive. You covered the basics in the first twenty minutes: work, where you live, how you each know Ines. Now the podcast he had on just ended, and there are two hours left.

Lorenzo

lets the podcast end without starting another one, both hands on the wheel, and glances over at you for a second

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30 things to talk about, with a line to start each one

These things to talk about are grouped from easy, safe topics to more personal ones. Each row gives you the topic, a line that opens it up, and the version that usually falls flat.

Easy everyday topics

Something they’re into right now“What’s something you’ve gone down a rabbit hole on lately?”Skip: “So, what do you do for fun?”
Food“What’s the best thing you’ve eaten lately?”Skip: “Are you a foodie?”
Food, with opinions“What’s a food everyone loves that you secretly don’t?”Skip: Judging what they’re eating right now
Shows and movies“What are you watching right now? I need something new.”Skip: Spoiling the ending of something they’re halfway through
Books and podcasts“Read or heard anything lately you keep thinking about?”Skip: “I don’t really read.” (and done)
Music“What’s a song you’ve had on repeat lately?”Skip: “What kind of music do you like?” (too broad)
Travel“What’s a place you keep wanting to go back to?”Skip: Listing every country you’ve been to
Weekend plans“Anything fun this weekend, or a full-on couch weekend?”Skip: “Big plans?” (sounds like a test)
Something they’re looking forward to“What’s something coming up that you’re excited about?”Skip: “Anything new?”

Their story

Childhood“What were you obsessed with as a kid?”Skip: “Did you have a good childhood?”
Hometown“What’s something about where you grew up that people wouldn’t expect?”Skip: “Oh, I’ve heard it’s boring there.”
Work, the good kind“What’s the most interesting thing you’ve worked on this year?”Skip: A third round of complaining about the reorg
Skills“What’s something you’re weirdly good at?”Skip: “What are your strengths?” (sounds like an interview)
Hobbies“How did you get into that?”Skip: “Isn’t that kind of expensive?”
Pets“Okay, I need to see a picture. What’s their personality like?”Skip: Talking about your pet for ten straight minutes

Light and fun

Opinions that don’t matter“What’s a hill you’ll die on that nobody else cares about?”Skip: A hot-button political opinion
Hypotheticals“If you could master one skill overnight, what would it be?”Skip: Ten would-you-rathers in a row
A group that’s stuck on a draining topic“New topic: best thing anyone’s eaten lately. Go.”Skip: Adding one more rumor to the pile
Something that made them laugh“What’s the funniest thing that’s happened to you this month?”Skip: “Tell me a joke.”
Small wins“What’s something you’re a little proud of lately?”Skip: “What have you accomplished this year?”

With specific people

With friends you see all the time“What’s something you’ve changed your mind about lately?”Skip: Retelling the same old stories again
With a friend who just had a baby“What’s on your mind lately that has nothing to do with the baby?”Skip: Only asking about sleep schedules
With your partner at dinner“What was the best part of your day, even if it was tiny?”Skip: Only talking through the shared calendar
With your partner, bigger picture“What’s something you want us to do this year that we haven’t yet?”Skip: “We never do anything fun.”
With a girl or guy you just met“What’s been the highlight of your week?”Skip: Questions about their ex
With a coworker at lunch“Watching or reading anything good right now?”Skip: Gossip about the person who just left the room
With an older relative“What was your first job like?”Skip: Only their health, again
Over text“Okay, random, but I just saw a dog in a raincoat and thought of you. How’s your week going?”Skip: “wyd”

Going deeper

Going a little deeper“What’s something you’d love to learn if you had the time?”Skip: “What’s your biggest regret?”
Values, when it feels right“What’s something you care about more than most people realize?”Skip: Starting a debate on religion

When you run out of things to talk about

Every conversation has pauses. A short silence isn’t failure, and you don’t have to break the awkward silence instantly. When you do want to restart, go back to the last thing they said (“Wait, you mentioned Lisbon earlier. What was that for?”) or look around at the setting. And if you’ve run out of things to talk about after a long, good conversation, that might just be the natural end. Wrap it up warmly and pick it up next time.

How to find things to talk about

Running out of things to talk about rarely means you’re boring. It usually means you’ve used up the “facts” topics and haven’t moved on to what the other person actually cares about.

1 of 4

Ask what they’re into right now

“What’s something you’ve gone down a rabbit hole on lately?” works with nearly anyone. Current interests are the best things to talk about because people have fresh opinions and details, and they light up explaining them.

A coworker at the end of a work lunch

Anyway, that’s enough about the Q3 numbers.

Flat reply

“Ha, yeah. So, do you have any hobbies?”

“Uh… not really? I like hiking, I guess.”

Better reply

“Agreed. What’s been taking up your free time lately?”

“Okay, don’t laugh. I’ve been learning to skateboard.”

Why it works: What they’re into right now comes with fresh details. “Hobbies” gets a list.

2 of 4

Use the setting when you’re stuck

The place you’re in is always a topic: the food, the music, the event, the drive, the view. When your mind goes blank, look around. It’s the simplest source of things to talk about, and it never feels random.

Someone at your table at a wedding

So… yeah. Nice wedding.

Flat reply

“Yeah. So, what do you do?”

Thirty seconds about insurance, then silence again.

Better reply

“It is. The band is going way harder than I expected, too.”

They laugh: “Right? The bassist is having the time of his life.”

Why it works: When your mind goes blank, look around. The room is always a topic.

3 of 4

Keep a few easy topics ready

Food, travel, shows and books, weekend plans, what someone’s looking forward to, and funny childhood stories work in almost any room. They’re safe, everyone has something to say, and they often lead somewhere more personal.

Your partner’s friend, while you both wait for them

So… they’re running late, huh.

Flat reply

“Yep.”

You both pull out your phones until they show up.

Better reply

“Classic. Hey, are you doing anything for Thanksgiving this year?”

“Ugh, hosting for the first time. I’m scared of the turkey.”

Why it works: An easy go-to topic like holiday plans works with almost anyone.

4 of 4

Follow the detail, then share your own

When they mention something (“I just got back from Lisbon”), stay on it: “What surprised you there?” Then add something of yours, the habit of any good conversationalist. The best topics of conversation come from following threads, not switching subjects every two minutes.

A date at a taco place

I just got back from visiting my grandma in New Mexico.

Flat reply

“Oh cool. Do you travel a lot?”

“Sometimes.” The topic switches before it starts.

Better reply

“Oh, what part? I drove through Santa Fe once and I still think about the green chile.”

“Albuquerque. And okay, now we have to talk about chile.”

Why it works: Stay on their detail, then add one of your own.

Topics that usually kill a conversation

Staying on a draining topic (work drama, a reorg, a bad commute) long after everyone’s tired of it.
Politics, money and religion with people you don’t know well yet.
Talking only about yourself once you find a topic you like.
Jumping between topics so fast that nothing gets past the first answer.

Things to talk about: FAQ

What are good things to talk about?

Good things to talk about are the ones people enjoy explaining: what they’re into lately, the best thing they’ve eaten, a trip they loved, a show they’re watching, something they’re looking forward to. Ask a specific question about one of those and follow the answer.

What are interesting topics to talk about?

Interesting topics are usually personal but light: something someone changed their mind about, a skill they’re weirdly good at, what they were obsessed with as a kid, a hill they’ll die on that nobody else cares about. They reveal personality without getting heavy.

What are good things to talk about with friends?

Good things to talk about with friends go past catch-up: what they’ve been thinking about lately, something they’d love to learn, plans you could make together, or a funny memory you share. Old friends often get stuck retelling the same stories, so a new question helps.

What are safe topics for small talk?

Safe small talk topics include the setting you’re in, food, travel, weekend plans, shows and books, pets, and how people know the host. Skip politics, money, religion and health with people you don’t know well.

What are good conversation topics for texting?

Over text, share something that made you think of them, send a small question they can answer quickly (“What are you watching right now?”), or follow up on something they mentioned earlier. Short and specific beats a long, generic “how are you.”

Meet Communicate Better

Knowing things to talk about is half of it. Saying them naturally takes practice.

Communicate Better is built for one thing: helping you communicate better. Step into real moments, say it your way, and see how it lands — until the right words come without thinking.

Learn more about Communicate Better →

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